Yeah, pretty clever to have figured out that cola spelled differently starts the word alcohol. And not a moment too soon, since Coca Cola has just released an alcopop—the company’s first alcoholic drink in 125 years, according to The Drinks Business. It’s lemon-flavored, lowish in alcohol, and sold only in Japan. Aimed at female drinkers (wow, now that’s a surprise), the alcopop is modelled on Japan’s “Chu-Hi” drinks which contain shōchū (a spirit usually distilled from sweet potatoes, barley, or rice), sparkling water, and fruit flavors. Coke says it’s not coming to the States. (But remember New Coke wasn’t supposed to happen either).
Well isn’t this brilliant. Just when flutes increasingly find themselves the object of Champagne-lovers’ dismay (even disdain), it’s beer to the rescue. The German Beer company Beck’s has just released beer in a can shaped like a flute. It’s not that far-fetched really. Historically, many traditional beer glasses were shaped like Champagne flutes, and both beverages derive some of their pleasure from bubbles. Curiously, one of the reasons the flute is in disfavor for Champagne is that it isn’t ideal for appreciating the wine’s aroma. (Because you can’t easily swirl the wine in a flute, volatile aromatic compounds aren’t easily released and the wine is rendered less “smellable.”) Leading us to wonder: are beer lovers less aromatically inclined?
I know this probably never happened to you, but others of us who drink wine have occasionally enjoyed ourselves a wee bit too much. That situation has given rise to a whole slew of morning-after remedies, including the charmingly named “hair of the dog.” Surely, not literal, right? Wrong. The expression originally referred to curing a rabid dog bite by placing hairs of the dog into the bite wound. This was just one example of the ancient medical theory similia similibus curantur (Latin for “like cures like”), which is the basic tenant of homeopathy. It tuns out that using alcohol as a remedy for too much alcohol is a pretty universal practice. So, whether you’re in Rome or Romania, Kenya or Korea, chances are someone will be able to provide just the right “dog hair” should you need it.
Ok all you English majors who love wine, this is for you. The next time you find yourself sniffing a wine that smells like a goat, you can oh-so-casually toss off one of the following which, according to Merriam-Webster dictionary, are all synonyms for unpleasant odors. And yes, one of these bad smell words does mean “bad goaty” as opposed to “bad garlicky” which is also in this list: outstink, nidor, noisome, mephitic, alliaceous, stinkeroo, hircine, malodorous, reekingly, kakidrosis.
It’s called BIG POUR but maybe the wine should be called BIG BOOB. The label shows a blond woman—face obscured by shadow—whose right breast pokes out through a gauzy top, as if the breast itself was reaching for the wine glass. At first, I thought BIG POUR was a bra commercial (don’t over-think this). But then I realized it’s just another cheap-shot objectification of women—this time via a not-cheap cabernet blend ($90). What’s demoralizing is that it’s made by Kelly Fleming, a Napa Valley (female) vintner. Isn’t it #timesup for this sort of thing?
So, last week we asked what well-known woman was named an honorary Artichoke Queen? (I know, it’s a little left field…). Anyway, our favorite answer was Monica Lewinsky. But the right answer was Marilyn Monroe. In 1947 (some sources say 1948) Monroe was given the honorary title by the California town of Castroville, even though as a younger woman she never scored the artichoke crown (apparently, she wasn’t considered beautiful enough).
I’m sure the Champenoise weren’t too crazy about this… In 1919, the American Tobacco Company featured “Piper Heidsieck Chewing Tobacco,” as a way to entice people to chew more tobacco. The tobacco itself was high-quality white Burley tobacco picked ripe. According to the United States Tobacco Journal, “Piper” was unequalled for chewing, and the rare Burley leaf was made even more delicious by blending it to achieve a flavor like Piper Heidsieck Champagne. Apparently if you chewed “Piper” once, you’d never be satisfied with any other tobacco.
It was “nutty” and “clean.” It was organic. It scored a 91 which translated as “excellent.” But it wasn’t a score from Parker, because Parker doesn’t rate pot. But Rachel Burkons does. She’s the Cannabis Editor of Clever Root magazine. And just so you’re up to speed on this, here’s her rating system:
98-100 A True Classic 95-97 Outstanding 91-94 Excellent 88-91 Very Good 84-87 Above Average 80-83 Average
Oh, the 91 in question? It was for Mondo, a dissolving cannabis powder that can be mixed into any drink and which Burkons says is “great for daytime consumption.”
So there you are—staring at a menu item that reads “Prawns Human Taste” (ah: Hunan Taste?) According to Atlas Obscura’s fantastic piece, “Why Menu Translations Go Terribly Wrong,”these aren’t just typos. Translating the names of dishes that exist within a cultural context can be next to impossible. Some entertaining (and delicious) examples:
To the list of all the things you can (but maybe shouldn’t) do while drinking, add this: ax-throwing. According to Tasting Table, two new ax-throwing places will open this year in Boston and ax-throwing bars already exist in Philadelphia and in Canada. If throwing an ax in between sips of pinot noir never crossed your mind, you’re, umm, not alone. But apparently ax-throwing is the new thing. The ax-throwing bars are careful to point out that safety precautions are taken and that an “axepert” supervises every throw. Co-founder of Revolution Axe company, Chris Greeno is quoted in the piece as saying. “If you and your boyfriend or girlfriend walk in for a romantic night of ax throwing, we want to accommodate you.” Good to know.